Back in that same boat.. heartbreak.
No one warns you how tough things get when you start to grow up.
Heart break is severely underrated. Its so much fucking worse than you can ever imagine. Nothing prepares you. It leaves you questioning whether its even worth being alive than to harbour all this pain. The pain never leaves. It might temporarily die down, but it can be resurrected with such ease.
it hurts. it hurts when it was yourself who made the circumstances like so.
why cant we turn emotions off? why is the human heart so fragile and the ego so easily bruised? why fucking why. Love. the worlds biggest misconception. Love is fucking trouble. are the flickers of good times worth what seems like an eternity of pain?
i hope to fucking to god they are. i think they are.
My good times with love are set in my memory in golden light. perfect. untouchable. soothing and warm. like a film with no sound. ecstasy. pure contentment. tears of joy. such gratitude and appreciation.
Life is a series of events. A spectrum of emotion. One is guaranteed to surpass the other. Combination of feelings. why can't anything in life be simple?
maybe reincarnation is like a gift. you get to come back as simpler beings. happy in their own world of knowing zilch. of course id rather be conscious. but at times like these, full of pain and heartache, id rather die. anything to numb the pain, take it away. knock me out pleaseeee. anything.
i need hope. i need strength. i need a inspiration.
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